Tea Time for Your Soul by Dr. Debi Newman
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Never Alone on Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day reminds us that we are not meant to be alone. Our hearts were designed to give and receive love, in our relationship with God and also with a significant person in our lives. That’s the reality. The problem comes when we go outside of God’s guidance to find a person to be with forever. It’s fun for a while, but ultimately leads to heartbreak.

I have a lot of heartache in my life. God has asked me to pick up some very unwanted and extremely painful crosses, yet He has blessed me with two true loves. I don’t get it. I don’t deserve it. I am sorry for others who have never been with a true love. I really am. I feel their pain and I listen to their longings. What I can say is that I left my life partners up to God. It was God who told me to marry.  

As humans our true love is not happily-ever-after. True love is two imperfect people loving each other for a lifetime. True love doesn’t mean that you like everything about your love or that you agree all the time. True love is chemistry. It’s magic; it’s beautiful. I love that I have a person that I can trust, who loves me and gets me and supports me through everything I must face. That is what everybody wants.

Waiting for God to give the person you really want—a true love—is not easy. There are many reasons that you are without a true love. Maybe God is preparing you to be the best version of yourself so that you can truly love and not give up when things aren’t exactly as you had hoped. I know that God wants you to learn that the love He gives to you is greater than any love you could ever find in a human relationship. In your time of waiting, let your soul open to God as your truest love. He will never leave you alone.

It may be a little harder for men than women to see God-Christ as your bridegroom. He is both gender’s true love, and both genders need His truest love desperately. Women like Margery Kempe explain our relationship with God as a marriage. “The Lord reminded me one day, ‘You’re My own true wife. Remember that I love you so much that I died for you? Don’t forget that’. Remember, too, that a wife takes pleasure in being at her husband’s side. A wife loves her husband and enjoys his company immensely—above all others—because that’s where she finds true acceptance, her greatest joy, and her greatest peace.” God wants us (male and female) to look to Him as our bridegroom. Isaiah 62:5 states: “As a young man marries a young woman, so will your Builder marry you; as a bridegroom rejoices over his bride, so will your God rejoice over you.” This image is repeated in Isaiah 54:5: “For your Maker is your husband—the Lord Almighty is His name—the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer; He is called the God of all the earth.”  Jesus made it clear that He is the Bridegroom, referring to Himself in that term. (Matthew 9:15, Mark 2:20, Luke 5:35, John 3:29). Of course, the book of Revelation clearly describes the moment of eternity that we all are preparing for (and noone more that our Bridegroom) which is the Wedding Feast of the Lamb. “Then the angel said to me, ‘Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the wedding supper of the Lamb!’ And he added, ‘These are the true words of God.’” (Revelation 19:9).

In this way, none of us who are in Christ are alone on Valentine’s Day. We have received the ultimate invitation of love. It is given every day of our lives on earth and will fully be experienced when we arrive in heaven and sin is defeated. We can become so blind to this love that we despair from our personal heartache. God is the original Valentine of our existence; all others are a mirror of His love and delight in us. Psalm 73:25 asks: “Whom have I in heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire besides you.” No one is without a true love this Valentine’s day. I hope you will enjoy the richness of true love in Christ!

Dr. Deborah Newman

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A daily devotion for Advent and Christmastide. Advent reveals the truth about who we are and why we are here. As our souls open to Advent, a reality that transcends the traditional warmth of the season comes into focus. The message of Christmas is to receive God's gift of His Son. As you count down to Christmas through the time-honored tradition of lighting a candle during each week of Advent, you will find guidance for getting off the Christmas-Pleasing Merry-Go-Round and discover the true hope love, joy and peace that Christmas brings.


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About Dr. Deborah Newman
Dr. Deborah Newman is a Licensed Professional Counselor and a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and a graduate of Bryan College, Grace Theological Seminary and Oxford Graduate School. She is the minister to Women and Congregational Care at Park Cities Baptist Church in Dallas. She is the author of many books including “Comfortable in Your Own Skin: Making Peace With Your Body Image,” “Beauty Secret: Tips for Teens from the Ultimate Makeup Artist,” “How to Really Love God as Your Father”, “Loving Your Body”,“Passion on Purpose”, “A Woman's Search for Worth,”‘And Then God Created Woman”, and co-author of “Passages of Marriage, “Love is a Choice Workbook,” “Day by Day Love is a Choice,” and “The Thin Disguise”.

She writes weekly on teatimeforyoursoul.com. She has contributed to numerous magazines and book projects. She has been guests on television and radio, including New Life Live, and Focus on the Family. She leads seminars and retreats across the country and internationally.

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Spiritual Progress Journal 2017

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The Forgetful Princess: The Story of a Princess Who Didn’t Know Who She Was

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